Long Time no Post

Yep, it's been ages, and bigbig news to all of my nonexistant readers.
*bigger fanfare*
We're settled!

Huzzah, hoorah, and whatnot.
I've been writing about it so much in places other than the web that I've quite run out of steam, unfortunately. I'll give it a go, though.

Well, I was bored on vacation with a rare opportunity to go online, so I scuttled off to TDF, as usual. We were in Arizona, and Sef had been trying out all of the local forms, for the flavor so to speak. We did raven, skink, coyote (briefly, we've never been much into canids), etc. The ones that we really liked were horned lizard (friggin wicked!) and desert bighorn. Sheep are obviously not me, but we looked up the analysis, anyway. No.

Then, for the hell of it, I clicked the caribou link (caribou have long been a favorite). Surprisingly, it was pretty accurate. I looked briefly for reindeer or caribou other than Peary's, but TDF didn't have more. That was when I think elk caught my eye.

Now, I'd looked at the elk analysis before, but not with a very open mind. I'd dismissed it as "not me at all", and blown on by. But this time, for some reason, everything clicked. It was so flipping perfect that I could've fallen off my chair.

We were hesitant with accepting it, at first. After all, banded mongoose had seemed pretty damn good at the time. But this one just felt right. I'd never felt anything like it in my life. I know that sounds horribly cliché, but it's true. Maybe I'd been using too many sharpies, but that's exactly how it felt. And it's kept feeling that way.

The more I research elk, the more I can find similarities. And it's utterly ridiculous that an animal's beaviour should be applied to human personalities, but it works. With a little tweak of the mind, a flick of the imagination switch, I can see myself exactly as I am in this beautiful animal.

So, Sef and were happily settled on July 14 as a Rocky Mountain elk soul. There have been snags, but most are worked out. I'm now able to categorize my friends into "bull" and "cow" friends, deending on their importance to me and their role in my life. I also have a strange and entirely unscientific explanation for why I get so many headaches, go through periods of intense hatred for my best friends, and like the odd bite of grass for lunch.

Oh, and I'm getting a bugle ringtone for my phone. Check it out.
http://www.elktalkin.com/index.html

Fanfare!

Huzzah for discoveries! I found this little jewel of a thread on TDF http://daemonpage.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=6864&postdays=0&postorder=asc&highlight=predator+prey&start=15
The Predator/Prey Thread!

Yes, yes. So, the more I read, the more convinced that my soul is both predatory and prey. I've got traits of both. And so, with this miraculous find, I am one tiny step closer to self-discovery and settlement! Cheer!

Quasi-Settledom

So, it's been a while since my last post, and Sefra has kept his banded form this whole time. The one exception was when we visited the aquarium. He had fun trying out the shapes of all the different fish.

But we like this form. It's by no means permanent, but I think it will be stable for a while. I might think that it could be our settled form, but I still don't feel completely right with it. I love banded mongooses, but there's just something about them that doesn't feel like a perfect fit. I don't know what it is. Anyway, we're content for now.

I've also discovered that my closest cousin is also a dæmian. When we'd talked about it, I'd always assumed that dæmianism was something that interested her, but not much else. Now, though, she actually visualizes her dæmon and talks to him (though she still uses a name that I suggested for him when I was half asleep). So, I sent her some links to dæmon analyses, and she came up with a massive list of forms that, apparently, fit her. Obviously not settled. Malchior (or Malchoir to her) likes to be an oversized golden albino axolotl.

No Settlement for Me

Ok, ok. I'll admit that thinking that I was settled was a bit naïve. But, hey, it just goes to show what seven days on the Dæmon Forum can do to you.

So, Sef has gotten much better at trying different forms. It still scares us a bit that his personality changes with each new form. I guess it's all in ow we perceive the animal. Our favorite forms are still the grey cat and fish, but we've also been trying the Banded mongoose. Greylag goose is also a cool one. I love geese so much. He still doesn't like the idea of being as big as a bongo is, but there's one forum member who's convinced that that's what we are. We'll see.

I don't usually go to the zoo, but I want to go see the Banded mongooses. Apparently they have them at the zoo here. It would be great to see more than pictures.

Banded Mongoose

I think that my certainty of being settled has gone down. Of course, I may be, but I'm still young. Either way, it doesn't worry me. I can just go with the flow and enjoy trying different forms. I posted a Reverse Analysis on the Dæmon Forum, just for the hell of it, and actually came up with some cool results. One person said lion, but changed her mind, another suggested kudu or bongo, but most agreed that I sounded like a mongoose.

It's funny, because I told my cousin that she seemed mongoose-like to me, but we are really similar. I looked up the description for one of the more sociable mongooses, the Banded Mongoose. It's actually very accurate.


Able to live just fine in a fair range of conditions -Get lethargic in hot weather (...like most of the world, I suppose)
Don't seem to be real fond of the heat at all
Gregarious
You like crowds and being around other people NOT ALWAYS
Tend to follow/be part of a small, core group within the larger
Easily recognise your friends and know all about 'em
Hierarchal
Tend to respect people based on their age, assertiveness and presence
Get along well with children
Considered small, whether that be physically or otherwise (>3) NO
Distinctive, but strangers don't always have an immediately positive reaction towards you
Participate actively in wooing your loved one, whether you be male or female
Happy enough to make use of what's available to avoid extra work, but only if you think it's suitable
Like having company in difficult stages
Cooperate very well with your friends, happily sharing tasks and duties without complaint
Very careful and protective of things that matter to you, but you have good reason for it - you've had bad experiences with losses
Like to do a few things individually; need a little time alone every now and then
Like to poke and dig around and see what comes up
Tend to have a vaguely systematic work method
Not an aggressive person; you respect authority too much to cause trouble
Show a kind and caring attitude towards all people, regardless of differences
Strong sense of community
Prefer to flee when sensing danger, but if that's not possible then you immediately turn to your friends for assistance
Like to keep in contact with your mates, even over long distances
Nomadic, like travelling; you like change in general, really, though you will often return to old favourites
Not terribly subtle; will often take the strong, straight-on approach if that will get you what you want SORT OF
Careful nature, and like to make sure everything is safe

Changeling

I've been reading that some people's dæmons are definitely settled, but still change form, even for long periods of time. I'd love for Sef to change form sometimes, so I've been trying to make him. He's ok about it, sort of, but it still feels weird. It doesn't feel like Sef. Maye it's because he's only ever been Sef as one of two types of cats. He's been a fish in the bathtub before, and that was ok, but we weren't being serious about it. I really don't know what I mean by that.

I'd like him to be able to change so that I can visualize him more often. Running up stairs with a slow little kitty isn't so convenient. And Sef's default pose is lying with his paws curled in front of him. He doesn't like to move much. But we've tried out a few forms. Actually, they've all been grey. Maybe that's some kind of subconscious effort on my part to help him feel more comfortable as more things. We've tried our fish (a little silver one with some kind of spot on its side), a Hooded crow (black with grey, and one we know well), a shikra once or twice, and a grey goose. The goose is the one that he freaks out least as.

I should probably stop pushing him, the poor guy. If we're both comfortable with a cat, then we can stay like that. But you can't go swimming with a little fluffball.

Writing Exercises

Lots of people talk about writing out conversations with their dæmons, but I actually never have until now. I always thought, while I would have loved to, that Sef wouldn’t be able to vocalize enough to have a conversation in words, as opposed to feeling. Once again, though, he’s proven me wrong. Turns out Sef does have a lot to say.

I think this latest conversation (typed out on MS Notepad) was the first time that he called me by my name, too. I know that sounds ridiculous, but I’m always the one talking, and he seldom has to get my attention, so there was never a time when he needed or had much opportunity to say my name. I don’t know why, but that really got me. I was close to tears. Maybe I’m PMSing, or something.